A Single Gal's Reflection on Weddings

I'm about to lose all the edge I generated for myself with that last post.

Wait for it.........

..... Wait........... for......... it--

IT'S REFLECTIONS ON WEDDINGS!!1!

I know, I know -- I am a single gal. I have not been in a serious relationship. I am aware this indicates I am "putting the cart before the horse," as the expression states. I don't even know that I will get married. It's not a future a dreamt of as a child and it's not quite on The List of Everything I Need To Do While I Am Here.

Still, I was caught off-guard with certain meandering thoughts while The Sister was going through her tight four months of prep for her special day. As much as I reflected on the relationship between my Sister and her newly-minted husband, it cast a rather stark spotlight on my own affairs (or, lack thereof).

Hmm, perhaps "stark" is a little... corrosive in tone. Truth is those four months got me to consider a path I'd never imagined for myself.

I have these little pockets of memory from the whole experience:

I remember The Sister's first dress fitting -- it was the first time I'd visited a bridal store and I was curious to check it out. Little did I know it was also the location where the bridesmaid dresses would be discovered as well. Anyhow, as The Sister was being Bride-ified, I took the time to browse through the racks. Oh, silly Moffatt -- that's how it starts. I stopped at those regal, princess-style dresses with crinoline for days. All I could do was touch the beading and imagine a girl walking down the aisle toward me in one.

SO RANDOM.

It hit me right in my little Moffatt heart. I tell you, helping someone plan their wedding warps your mind. It starts uncovering these weird thoughts you never knew existed.

I think the idea of it hit hardest on the night of the rehearsal. O'Neill and I were loitering in the ceremony room, protecting some coats and camera equipment while the families were downstairs at the banquet hall. O'Neill asked with that comfortable bluntness we've built: "How about you? Can you see yourself up there?" I think I gave a bashful "No," but we were both acting tougher than we felt at the time.

It's weird once extended family members get involved. I wouldn't want my wedding to invite those snide, passive-aggressive and homophobic comments. If I could keep it to immediate family and friends, I'd be in the clear --wait a minute, see that? You see what happens? I start talking like I will get married. I need to think of meeting people and dating first, not this running head-long down the aisle.

Egads.

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I was inspired for tonight's post by emily hartl over at AfterEllen. She has a Styled Out column on the the site where she discusses the ins and outs of lesbian fashion. This week, she focused on weddings with a gay twist. She pointed out another site called So You're EnGAYged, a gorgeous and comprehensive guide for queer couples and straight allies. Serious, flip through the wedding photos and just TRY to suppress the cartoon hearts that will abound.

Conversely, Kama over at The Queer Behind The Mirror tackles the issues inherent to the phrase, "gay marriage." I love picking apart language and pushing the connotations that hide in seemingly innocuous words -- Kama makes a compelling argument about the heteronormative edge embedded in the term "gay marriage."

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OLYMPIC UPDATES:

What the heck, Team Canada. I am forced from the blog for ONE DAY and that's when you start "own[ing] the podium." Gosh darn. Our newest medal winners include:

• Scott Moir and Tessa Virtue, Ice Dancing (Gold, Feb. 22)
• Ashleigh McIvor, Ladies' Ski Cross (Silver, Feb. 23)
• Clara Hughes, Speed Skating - Ladies' 5000 m (Bronze, Feb. 24)
• Heather Moyse and Kaillie Humphries, Women's Bobsleigh (Gold, Feb. 24)
• Shelley-Ann Brown and Helen Upperton, Women's Bobsleigh (Silver, Feb. 24)
• Jessica Gregg, Kalyna Roberge, Marianne St-Gelais, Tania Vicent, Short-Track Speed Skating - Ladies' 3000 m Relay (Silver, Feb. 24)

I imagine Canadians across the nation are drunk on the achievements of these athletes tonight. The ladies have amped-up our awards ceremonies with their intense (and clustered) medal-worthy performances.

Sets a queer girl's heart all a-flutter. Oh Canada, indeed.