Oh, Sweet Gaydar -- Prove Thy Merits in the Office

The current work placement offers a bevy of awkward, office moments detailed with a delicate hand by yours truly. From awkward speculations on this blogette's sexual orientation to off-hand and inappropriate comments on queer kids in general, I have ample stories to divulge from the front lines of the paper-pushing world.

It all changes tonight.

Between the stacks of filing and the endless rebate claim forms, I found myself at the heart of a conversation that set the ol' Gaydar for a loop.

Of course, there's a woman involved -- she's a fellow summer "student," where student is code for "two inches from unemployment but still considered young enough to be 'student' material." I shall name her AXC for the sake of the blog. Another of the summer "students" shall be known as iPod Ears (for her startling, MP3-induced hearing loss) and there's a full-timer in the mix as well. Whoa, this is getting complicated -- I imagine most gossip takes on this hue.

Anyhow, on to the tale:

Setting: CSR corner, afternoon. Miz Moffatt sifts through a monstrous stack of loose papers and disorganized files. She pouts and occasionally staples. AXC is in the same space as the filing cabinet where Miz Moffatt pouts.

Enter: iPod Ears with a message for the Full-Timer in question. iPod Ears stops for a quick chat.

iPod Ears: I just started getting into Lost. I never watched an episode before I heard about the finale. Now, I'm on, like, season three.

Full-Timer: Yeah, I've never seen Lost before. I heard it's a good one. A little weird, but good once you're into it.

iPod Ears: What other shows are you in to?

(Miz Moffatt misses the first half of the response after an ill-timed CSR outburst)

Full-Timer: .... United States of Tara. It's all shows on Showcase or the Movie Network, now.

iPod Ears: Have you seen Mad Men?

Full-Timer: No--

iPod Ears: OH my God, it's SO GOOD. It's set in, like.... the 1950s, I guess?

Full-Timer: That's the one with the woman with the huge tits on her, right?

iPod Ears: Yeah, the red head?--

AXC: (Across the room) CHRISTINA HENDRICKS!!

iPod Ears: Yeah! That's her.

AXC: Aah, she's so curvaceous and so beautiful. I watch it just for her.

Full-Timer: And she's got f**king huge tits. (Note: I am not even inventing this language).

iPod Ears: Aww, I know. She's so pretty.

AXC: She's gorgeous. (Miz Moffatt notes a slight exhalation from AXC, a sigh perhaps...?)

*End Scene*

EDIT (06/10/10): I should also add the Full-Timer is a woman. I realise I did not make that clear the first time around.

.... I took a mental double-take at the situation. I know straight gals discuss the merits and physical attributes of other women. I know these same straight gals are also comfortable enough to remark over another woman's attractiveness. But, there was a subtle shift with AXC. I know I can't quite capture the tone of it all in print, but it was there.

Am I not the only gay in the office?

I sense a new project on the horizon....