An(other) Open Letter to Alan Ball, Creator of True Blood

Dearest Alan Ball,

I am pleased to find such a response to the first letter I directed to your attention. It appears the drought of true lesbian women has, at last, ceased in Bon Temps, Louisiana. Our thirst for Sapphic action has been both quenched and heightened in one shot and I give sincere thanks for the delightful moment of vamp-on-girl erotics from tonight's episode.

Granted, it took until season three, episode three for that to occur. I am willing to overlook the inherent travesty of such a delay in exchange for more delicious scenes with our reigning queer vamp, Pam (Kristen Bauer).

And, for a more well-rounded queer experience, it appears the same Estonian exotic dancer from Eric's S&M chamber also quite appreciates Pam's brand of, um, "lip service," shall we call it. So there, a bisexual human hottie who's managed to capture the attention of Eric, queen Sophie-Anne, and Pam in a matter of three episodes.

I know the old adage describes terrible events occurring in threes, but it seems to apply for salacious vampiric moments, also.

Oh, Mr. Ball -- I know there is still much ground to cover this season when it comes to those elusive queer women on True Blood. I must remind you, much like V, one taste from the Sapphic cup tends to invite stronger cravings than before. I do hope you are prepared to meet and exceed those expectations for us lady-lovin'-ladies who pledge our Sunday evenings to your particular brand of vampire-based entertainment.

And yes, I do keep tabs.

I await your response, sir.

-- Miz Moffatt

P.S. -- While I have you here, I must ask -- please, treat Tara (Rutina Wesley) well this season. Serious, someone needs to cut her a bit of slack. Her one true love is buried, she is on a downward spiral toward suicide, and now she's hooked up with an eerie vamp who's tracking Bill? I saw clips of her future self running through open fields, too. And no, she did not look pleased to be running. Mr. Ball, I beg of you -- give Tara an uplifting plot line. She is far too hot to waste on literal dead ends.

I will settle for a Pam/Tara hook-up, if you insist.